Diva Paris Hilton and VP wannabee Sarah Palin clock in at #1 and #3, ahead of the next President of the United States. Priorities - they're what make this country great.

Howard Stern, who takes offense every time columnists write him off as irrelevant, proves his popularity in the 39th slot. Oddly, though, so do hardware giants Home Depot and Lowe's, at 42 and 45 - possibly because the declining economy has spawned a rash of do-it-yourself projects. Which means Joe the Plumber will slip to the lowest tax bracket and his problems are solved. Sweet.

The Brawl of the Fall is on. Christmas, at 15, has got Thanksgiving on the ropes at 27. But Thanksgiving is a crafty veteran with some late-round punch. Put a dime on Turkey Day to hang in there.

YouTube, off-the-charts strong at #2, is now the Official Website of Procrastinators Everywhere. Other ways we bilk our bosses out of productive hours include Facebook, at #6, Wikipedia and Bit Torrent (24 and 25), Flickr (33) and LimeWire (41). This whole "online thing" just might catch on.

So there you have it. To recap: Paris, more admired than Obama. D.I.Y., more popular than that plumber guy. Videos shot on cell phones, more popular than job security. Happy November.